A LEVELS

My mind is going to explode thinking about all this. 

Last friday. I got my results. They weren't that great. Not that I expected them to be. 

ccd/c and u for gp. So basically with a U for gp, I can't go anywhere besides private U.

I was all set to repeat at first.. then i gave up.. so decided on private.

Lalala happy alrdy lah... but then. tdy happened. Not gnna really elaborate but it made me think again. Am I gonna regret this in years to come? What if I could do better? What if??? I don't want to have to ask myself this years down the road or even worse, when I'm studying. 

Can do I better? That's another question I have to ask myself. Strange thing.. I think I can. 

I made a stupid mistake on my phy paper by missing out on a 20 mark question. which got me a d (that's what she said.. haha) 

This is my opportunity for a do over. I think I can do better for Math.. a C just isn't enough in my opinion.

the rest of the subjects, I'm not sure. For gp, I'll have to put a whole lot of effort. which I didn't really do before.

I was discussing w my bro about this.. And he supports me.... But my mom.... another story. Even my dad was like... Go ahead! 

She doesn't what me to repeat cuz she isn't confident I can do better. She doesn't think I'm smart enough. Well.. that's a depressing thought. Doing this is a risk. And with my mom not supporting me in this, I don't know how. I really don't know. I don't know.

I know I was playful doing my a level days. I wasn't fully committed. Which to this day, I regret.

I need support.

I need someone to talk to.

Ya Allah, make me make the right decision. I need you.